63 EVEN IN THE VALLEY, GOD IS GOOD

“Am I more interested in the healing, or the healer??”

I saw a beautiful video on the internet the other day from another individual who is also dealing with a GBM.  He made this statement: “Am I more interested in the healing, or the healer??”  I cannot take credit for that thought.  It’s all this gentleman’s, but I thought it was a good one so I’m passing it on.
We so often pray for God’s healing in a person’s life.  However, what if I can do more for God, walking this path and in His timing, eventually, going “Home to HIM”?

Until such time as He lets me know what’s next and when, I’ll just keep fighting on one day at a time.

UPDATE JUST FROM MY HEART TO YOURS.

 I can’t walk and chew gum at the same time these days which could be a good thing.   It takes too much energy and concentration to just lift my left foot and stay balanced.  So I laughed at myself the other day, which is an important place to be emotionally, laugh at yourself.  There are enough things in life that are hard, so laugh when you can, even if it’s about yourself.  That is still a process God continues working in my heart.  Maybe if I would keep my mouth shut more when it should be I could get further down the road towards that stop sign, saying only what really needs to be said.  Could that be true at other times as well as today? 

When I was in college, I played in the college band.  We did at times use instruments you would normally see only in an orchestra.  I played in the percussion section most of the time.  That's one of the most diverse parts. Today it may be a snare drum, while the next song could have you playing some other instrument of the same general type.  At any rate it was fun, as long as everyone was in tune and rhythm.  Start out early on one of those drums like timpani, which you actually tune (sometimes in the middle of the piece), or let a drummer come in out of rhythm or if one of the players doesn’t play the correct note at the correct time, then it does not sound so good, no matter how good the conductor is.  I hope I am following along with the Conductor as He leads me through
the next step.

I also enjoyed the time our professor gave all the graduating seniors the opportunity to conduct one of the pieces.  I was nervous but it was a great opportunity I look back on the with good memories, even though I was quite nervous.
There are certainly days my heart needs to be more in tune with the Conductor.
Here’s a song that encouraged me a lot this week.  Thanks to my wonderful friend for sharing.

It doesn’t matter my circumstances, God is still good.


Psalm 150 –This psalm was in my heart this week as well.

Praise ye the Lord. Praise God in his sanctuary: praise him in the firmament of his power.
Praise him for his mighty acts: praise him according to his excellent greatness.
Praise him with the sound of the trumpet: praise him with the psaltery and harp.
Praise him with the timbrel and dance: praise him with stringed instruments and organs.
Praise him upon the loud cymbals: praise him upon the high sounding cymbals.
Let every thing that hath breath praise the Lord. Praise ye the Lord.

PRAISES: 

When life throws you something you weren't expecting, “make lemonade” or something else you enjoy.  I am on disability right now.  That means I would normally have been working on a day like this past Tuesday when my church had a special ladies luncheon as part of our mission’s conference.  In previous years I wouldn't have been able to enjoy such a day because of work.   However, because things have changed for me and I was feeling well I was able to enjoy something special.  I was able to enjoy a day at my church in the middle of the week.  I had prayed God would give me strength for the day to enjoy something special and He did just that.  It was a great day, very encouraging and nice to get out with my church family and friends and my Mom who joined me for the day.  So, while I am on disability, I enjoyed a day out with some VERY special people.  AND the meeting was far from sour lemonade, it was so encouraging and enjoyable.

Physical/emotional strength for each difficult day.

**Lessons God continues to bring my way about Himself, me, others around me and life in general.

My trips to the stop sign at the end of the road are still “Painfully” slow in many people’s eyes.  However, they are getting better, and I WILL continue to make them as long as my body will stick to it with me.

PRAYER REQUESTS: (I realize I keep posting the same requests, but they are still relevant/needed.  So, I’ll continue posting them, but I’ll try to add a marker if it’s something new.  No promises that I’ll remember to do that every time.)

Extra fatigue from medication and other changes in how my body responds to treatment and changes.  So please pray for extra strength on a daily basis.

Continued strength to manage the physical strain of some of the treatment and exercises to improve mobility.

Courage to face the unknown and opportunities to show the grace of God through difficult times.

Safety.

Family who are hanging in there with me through this battle.  Wisdom to know my limitations and observe them.

Next MRI and doctor visit March 15:

You may have noticed my writing may jump around a little sometimes.  So, if I’m talking one minute about the night hours, it might be because a thought came to me in the night, then the following day, I’ll put it together with other thoughts.  So, if it seems like my thoughts are jumping around, it’s because the time in which I write may have changed from 4am to 9am.

Life is HARD but God is good. Now to try and catch up on some more sleep for the night.   I’ll stop for now with the following:

The other day we were sitting around chatting about giving something a good effort. My dad said he gave the grass a quick cutting.  He said he gave it a “lick and a promise”.  In other words, he gave it an effort just not a solid effort.  I always learn new sayings around my parents – so many wise or sometimes humorous sayings.  I also remember a saying from a classic children's movie that included a talking baby deer who spoke with other animals in the movie. One of the other characters was a small rabbit who says. "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.”  Why can't we remember that and be a little nicer sometimes? 

Another confession about life these days (I may have already told you this story but in case you missed it):

On the rare occasion that I do go out to the store these days (I tend to save my energy for walks to the stop sign or other events like the event at church).  I use a motorized shopping cart.  I'm doing this entire movement of driving with only my right hand (since the left one doesn’t work so well).  So, if my phone rings or for some other reason I have to stop, it will be wherever I am.  There was a man once who became upset with me since I was stopped in the middle of the isle.  I had tried to get out of his way, but there were a lot of boxes in the isle.   He was rather frustrated by my stopping and I know what he was thinking as I’m sure others under the same circumstance, “Why doesn't she just move over with that other hand?”  At least that is what his attitude suggested.  How often does my attitude falsely accuse someone without knowing the circumstances?  It's not my job to accuse peoples’ actions, that's God's place.  Mine is simply to love them and hopefully show them what life is truly about.

So where are we today?  Still one step at a time, however long it takes.  Sorry shoppers trying to get around me.  I'll try to stay out of your way as much as possible.  Heavenly Father, help me to be more understanding of other people's situations and be more understanding of their needs.  I probably have no idea how long it took them, just to get up today and get dressed, or how exhausting a simple trip to the store can be.  In the meantime, the outing is usually nice.  Thank you, Father, for another day today and for Your constant emotional/physical/spiritual provisions.  I pray my life does praise you today.

Now, if you all will excuse me.  There is a stop sign “calling me”.  I must go “answer that call”.

Follow-up on the walk:

Well, truth be told.  It didn’t go so well this morning.  I had my timer all set, I was going to come back to tell you how long it takes to get to the stop sign and back.  However, I think I might have been extra tired from my endeavors yesterday.  I was on the way home with horrible time on my timer.  When I got back, I tried to sit down and take a break, but my left foot gave out and to the floor I went.  The good thing is - no harm or bruises. Perhaps at least for now, the only bruise is my pride.  So, I’ll have to give you the distance and time in another entry.  In the meantime, however, I was able to help find a missing staple on the floor.  Make the most of any situation!  

Praise Him! again for His safety and for His strength.  We’ll try that walking thing again soon.  I’ll get back to you on that one!