#53 MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Here are my thoughts for this week, one of my favorite times of the year, Christmas and New Year’s.  First, I'll start with my New Year’s resolution:

No more falling in 2018.  I am asked at every doctor’s visit if I have fallen recently.  I have gotten into the habit of saying no.  But I can't just rattle off an answer like that now.  It started with the “crash of 2017”.  You can read about that in a previous blog entry.  But the holidays can be rough sometimes in many different ways.  On Tuesday before Christmas I fell after passing out, probably from exhaustion of two days back to back that were extra tiring.  Then Christmas Eve (afternoon) I fell off a stool trying to take pictures for Christmas in front of the tree.  Medical professionals have told me that because of the injury to my mobility and the lack of proper feeling on my left side from surgery and treatment that things like this can happen.  They expect with time and continued therapy and improved strength, this too will improve, and I only need to be concerned if I hurt myself or if things get significantly worse. However, I simply lost my balance sitting on the stool, something that I knew was a potential problem. This time I ended up with a 6-inch bruise on my leg from Tuesday and a bump on the head from Christmas Eve.  Thankfully the bump on the head was on the opposite side of my surgery.  That was the worst of the injuries apart from my frustration of having to call my retired parents to help me out. I know a lot of people are praying for me and I appreciate that.  But when you mention my name, would you please add their names too?  I think weeks like this one add gray hairs to their heads.  I was also joking afterwards that my guardian angels are probably asking God for a vacation from their duties with me.  All kidding aside, I am thankful for God's protection during these two incidents.  Things could have been SO much worse.

After my visit to the floor of the living room Sunday afternoon, I told my mom she wouldn't have to sweep the floor for Christmas.  My clothes were taking care of that as I struggled to get back on my feet.  We laughed and tried not to take ourselves too seriously.

On Christmas Eve I decided that despite the adventures of the day, the Christmas Eve service at church was a good place for me to go.  Why?  Because I can. I am thankful that I was able to do so.  So many others would like to have been there but just simply were unable to get out of bed or for some other reason just couldn't make it.  I said in the car coming home that it just seemed like the right place to be. Not only that, but it was encouraging to be around others who have faced harder times this week, than I have, but decided a Christmas Eve service at our church was also the right place to be.  Why?  Because we can.  And why can we, because of God's grace and the true meaning of Christmas.  It's all about perspective, I suppose.    At the end of the service A little girl sang the following song.  This is not her recording, but I wanted to share a link to a beautiful way of putting Christmas in the right perspective.  Here is the link.
So Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

PRAISES:

Safety, and strength for each new day.

Lessons God continues to bring my way about Himself, me, others around me and life in general.

Encouragement from others around me who are also struggling with issues of their own, many bigger than mine, but keep their eyes on the Lord and remind me that it’s not about me, it’s about what my life can do for HIM and what He can do through me.  For those of my friends who have experienced difficulties in the past couple of weeks or so or who share their difficult experiences from the past and continue to show God’s grace in their lives.  Thank you. You are an encouragement to me.

PRAYER REQUESTS:  (Some of these remain the same, but are still relevant/needed.)

Continued strength to manage the physical strain of some of the treatment and exercises to improve mobility.

The electronic stimulation device for my leg mentioned in a previous blog – still waiting for some details to sort out, but we’re getting closer.

Courage to face the unknown and opportunities to show the grace of God through difficult times.

Safety.

Family who are hanging in there with me through this battle.

Wisdom to know my limitations and observe them.

Next round of double chemo started Christmas Day and will continue for 6 weeks.

Next MRI and doctor visit Feb 8.

#52 AN EXPLANATION

When I was challenged to start this blog.  I was a bit nervous about it.  I am not generally a very open and public person.  I do not post things on social media or tell everyone I know what I’m thinking at a particular moment.  People have often commented that they view me as a “private person”.  That would be correct.  So, this blog took me to a whole other level personally.  I said at the very beginning of this blog that I didn’t want this to become a “feel sorry for Debbie” activity. 

I have felt the need to be open and honest about what’s going on, which requires me to share some things I might otherwise keep private.  Yet if I’m going to express to you anything about this journey, it MUST include references to the grace of God through these difficult times and experiences.  I said from the beginning of this journey, I could not handle any of this without His grace.  Yes, this means I must share certain personal details in order to express how grace comes in.  Don’t feel sorry for me or pity me in any way.  Instead celebrate God’s grace and in whatever change in your life you weren’t expecting comes along lean on that grace.

But by the grace of God I am what I am: and his grace which was bestowed upon me was not in vain; but I laboured more abundantly than they all: yet not I, but the grace of God which was with me. - 1 Corinthians 15:1-10

I commented last time on some of the rudeness of people you meet shopping.  Well, I hate to mention all the bad and not give credit when it’s due.  Yesterday, I was “walking”, yes, not riding in a wheelchair out of a store and as always it was taking a long time.  A lady held the door for me.  I said, “I hope you’re not in a hurry.  This could take a while.”  She said, “Don’t worry.  I’m in no hurry.  People are in too much of a hurry these days and miss so much in life.”  I agreed with her and thanked her for her patience.  My mom has constantly reminded me in life that people need to stop and smell the roses.  Well, I now have plenty of time when walking somewhere to smell the roses or other things I might prefer to ignore.

Now with this Optune device on my head, I have an electric blanket attached to my head.  During Florida summers with hot temperatures and high humidity, it’s not so nice.  But this time of year, when it’s cooler, as it is right now for Florida, the electric blanket is kind of nice.  This morning, I noticed it was extra warm.  My head actually felt hot, like a fever.  It wasn’t that, but my dad mentioned (I like his thinking).  “You know, when that electrical current hits such resistance as a brain the size of yours (because you are so smart), it’s going to produce more heat. Good thinking, Dad.  I like your thought processes.

praises:

More small steps forward with my left leg and arm.  Slow but sure.

God’s continued provision and faithfulness, including, working out issues that have been hanging on for 3 months, unrelated to health matters.

Right now, I am on a short break from the chemo.  That’s a nice break.  The only negative part is that it starts back up again Christmas Day.  Not the Christmas celebration I would have chosen, but Christmas isn’t about me anyway.

PRAYER REQUESTS: (Some of these remain the same, but are still relevant/needed.)

Continued strength to manage the physical strain of some of the treatment and exercises to improve mobility.

The electronic stimulation device for my leg mentioned in a previous blog – still waiting for some details to sort out, but we’re getting closer.

Courage to face the unknown and opportunities to show the grace of God through difficult times.

#51 SPIRITUAL WARFARE

a few thoughts from my heart this week:

Thursday morning, I have to admit I had a bit of a battle within myself.  There is no excuse.  God is great.  He has blessed me beyond measure.  I am, however, human and fail to hold onto faith sometimes.  Thank you, Father for your patience with me.  Which reminds me of:

For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places – Ephesians 6:12

I really don’t need to worry.  God always keeps His promises.

Know therefore that the Lord thy God, he is God, the faithful God, which keepeth covenant and mercy with them that love him and keep his commandments to a thousand generations – Deuteronomy 7:9

As previously promised, here is a picture of the wonderful gift sent to me from the Bible Baptist Church, Makongeni.  Thank you again.  Not pictured here is the tea, that I have already been enjoying.

Sometimes when you’re having a rough day, God will bring something along your path to just make you smile and forget your rough start.  Let me explain:

When you go shopping, you never know what kind of people you are going to meet.  Last week I was at a local grocery store (supermarket) and left my phone in the shopping cart.  When I realized what I had done, we went back and found a lady who had seen it and turned it in as lost.  I thanked her for her honesty.  Yesterday, I was at the same store and now with my mobility issues, I use a motorized cart.  Below is a picture for my friends reading this who may not be familiar with these carts.  They are available in many stores here for customers to use while shopping.  Now back to yesterday, I was going through the store and there was an older lady in one of these carts, as was I.  She saw me coming and hurried to get in front of me.  She wasn’t joking either.  She really cut me off to go down the isle first.  I thought I was back in Nairobi traffic.  I’m not sure what was going through her mind, but she certainly was determined to be first.  I think I might have even laughed out loud once I realized what she was doing.  Maybe she used to be a NASCAR driver or an East African Safari Rally driver. 😊  Either way, God provided an amusing end to a hard day.

praises:

I am amazed at how many people are praying for me.  I was reminded again this past week of a comment I had made a while back.  There are so many people praying around the world and across the USA for me.  I have people praying in so many different time zones that God must hear my name a lot during a 24-hour period.  As well, I am constantly being told from people I don’t even know that their family and/or church in some other location are praying for me.  It’s a truly humbling experience.  I am blessed with friends, family, acquaintances and total strangers who see the value of prayer.

I have been doing some more research on GBMs and read something that may or may not be true.  It is NOTaccording to my doctor.  However, when you cross from monthly scans to scans every two months, that is a bit of a milestone.  Well, my next scan is in 2 months.  I’m going to hang onto the hope that this is a good thing, whatever the reason.

Continued improvements in how I’ve been feeling/strength.

God’s continued provision and faithfulness.

No more trips to Tampa until February, unless something comes up.  That means no scans, no doctor visits, etc.

BECAUSE I CAN MOMENT:

A few days ago, I picked up my left leg and set it into the car first, something I’ve not done in over a year. Small steps, I know.  But still steps in the right direction.

Improved strength.

PRAYER REQUESTS: (These are the same as my last entry, but still remain relevant/needed.)

Continued strength to manage the physical strain of the treatment and exercises to improve mobility

The electronic stimulation device for my leg mentioned in a previous blog – still waiting for some details to sort out, but we’re getting closer.

Courage to face the unknown and opportunities to show the grace of God through difficult times.

#50 HAPPY THANKSGIVING AND MEDICAL UPDATE

A few thoughts from the week:

I have not kept up as well with my blog entries recently. This is a busy time of year with the holidays. As I mentioned in my last post, for the first time in a LONG time, my parents, my two brothers and I were together for Thanksgiving. My brother, Doug and his wife, Donna, missionaries in Kenya, arrived the Sunday before Thanksgiving. There were other extended family and friends who also joined in the day, making it a great time to get together as family.

This week I have been encouraged by a couple of songs, sung in church and otherwise just brought to my attention. Here’s one:

Day by Day

Day by day, and with each passing moment,

Strength I find to meet my trials here;

Trusting in my Father’s wise bestowment,

I’ve no cause for worry or for fear.

He, whose heart is kind beyond all measure,

Gives unto each day what He deems best,

Lovingly its part of pain and pleasure,

Mingling toil with peace and rest.

Every day the Lord Himself is near me,

With a special mercy for each hour;

All my cares He fain would bear and cheer me,

He whose name is Counsellor and Pow’r.

The protection of His child and treasure

Is a charge that on Himself He laid;

“As thy days, thy strength shall be in measure,”

This the pledge to me He made.

Help me then, in every tribulation,

So to trust Thy promises, O Lord,

That I lose not faith’s sweet consolation,

Offered me within Thy holy Word.

Help me, Lord, when toil and trouble meeting,

E’er to take, as from a father’s hand,

One by one, the days, the moments fleeting,

Till with Christ the Lord I stand.

I had the privilege of hearing Doug preach this past Sunday, who reminded us that our enemy, Satan, is out to defeat us, but by knowing our enemy, how he works, thinks and attacks, we can have victory through Christ. That reminded me of another song and Scripture.

Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.

But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.

All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the Lord hath laid on him the iniquity of us all.

He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth: he is brought as a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is dumb, so he openeth not his mouth - Isaiah 53 4-7

JESUS NEVER FAILS 

Words and Music by Gary Driskell

So many souls have tested Him
Throughout the course of time
So many still reach out to Him
With broken hearts and minds

And everyone of them will say
Without exception that they find
Jesus never fails

Even in the days of old
He brought His people through
Then He came to show His love
And He died for me and you

And then He rose again to prove
That every story had been true
Jesus never fails

Chorus
Jesus never fails
Jesus never fails
You might as well get thee behind me Satan
You cannot prevail
Because Jesus never fails

Sometimes this world brings trouble
I find so hard to bear
I know I could not make it
Without Jesus being there
It’s so encouraging to know
However deep we’re in despair
That Jesus never fails

So what can I do to prove to you
Tell me, how can you deny?
No untold facts, no mysteries
It’s all so cut and dry
And on the witness stand of your life
I’ll be the first to testify
That Jesus never fails

Repeat Chorus

Doug also brought some great updates of things in Kenya and he brought “get-well” cards from some of the churches with whom I worked while a missionary in Kenya. It was wonderful reading the notes of encouragement. Then he surprised me with a gift and card from the Bible Baptist Church, Makongeni, Thika. I grew up in this church as a young missionary kid (MK) and continued there even as an adult missionary, working with some truly wonderful people. To say that gift and card meant a lot, would be quite an understatement. It brought lots of tears to my eyes and joy to my heart. Thank you for all the kindness expressed through your actions and cards.


I will post pictures soon. For now, I am thoroughly enjoying the tea. Thank You.

medical update:

Today, I went back to Moffitt for a visit with my doctor and to get the report from Monday’s MRI. Here’s what He said:

The MRI looked good. There are still places that show changes, but he called them pseudo-progression, which is a false indication that the tumor could be growing, but is more likely, changes due to the radiation treatment. He also said there are more signs that it is not tumor growth because there are no blood vessels in the spots they are seeing, which would also indicate that it’s not tumor growth. He once again said he didn’t understand what was happening in my case because my cancer is not acting “normal”.

So, of course we celebrated with frozen yogurt.



PRAISES: 

Continued improvements in how I’ve been feeling.

God’s continued provision.

BECAUSE I CAN MOMENT:

Today, I walked in to see the doctor, something I’ve only done once before. Sure, it took a while. I kept telling everyone they could have a head start, if they needed it. 😊

Improved strength.

I received an encouraging call today concerning some continued treatment and a possible step forward in the device for my leg/foot.

PRAYER REQUESTS:

Continued strength to manage the physical strain of some of the treatment and exercises to improve mobility.

The electronic stimulation device for my leg mentioned in a previous blog – still waiting for some details to sort out, but we’re getting closer.

Courage to face the unknown and opportunities to show the grace of God through difficult times.

#49 FAMILY

a few thoughts from the week:

The other morning, I awoke at 5am, not a normal time I would have been getting up, now that I am not working a regular job.  However, I find I have some really clear moments to think/pray in the quiet of the morning.  This past Sunday was Orphan Sunday.  My church had been praying for a little girl for quite some time to find her “forever home”.  We got an update on Sunday that she has.  What an encouragement to see answered prayer and know she has a family to spend the holidays with.

Then I was reminded after that thought passed through my head of the story of “Annie” who also was an orphan and the song that they sing in the movie and the play entitled Tomorrow.

Here are a few lines:

The sun'll come out

Tomorrow

So ya gotta hang on

'Til tomorrow

Come what may

Tomorrow, tomorrow

I love ya tomorrow

You're always

A day, Away.

Of course, then I was reminded of Scripture that tells us there is no guarantee of tomorrow.

Go to now, ye that say, Today or tomorrow we will go into such a city, and continue there a year, and buy and sell, and get gain: Whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away., – James 4:13, 14

Please excuse the wanderings of my mind as I continue to walk you down the path of my 5am thoughts. However, for those of us who have accepted God’s gift of salvation there is a promise.

But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof. – Matthew 6:33, 34

I’ll stop with one more 5am thought.  I’m grateful that my God holds my future in HIS hands.  Now back to Orphan Sunday.   I am also truly thankful that God has blessed me with a family who loves me, cares for me and encourages me.  Fifty-five years ago, my parents married.  You just don’t hear of commitment like that these days.  Fifty-four years ago, they were blessed with a little boy, my brother, Doug. Fifty-one years ago, they were blessed with my brother, David.  Forty-one years ago, of course, saving the best for last, 😊 they were blessed with a little girl, ME!!  I do not take my family for granted, I thank God for each one of them.  I AM BLESSED!

Mostly, however, I am thankful to be a part of God’s eternal family.

praises:

Yesterday, I had an eye exam and before we started, I filled him in on the past year and a half.  The doctor was concerned by something he saw and told me I needed to let my neurologist know about it right away.  I told him I had an appointment in 2 weeks.  He said, that I needed to tell them sooner.  He gave me a report, to read to them over the phone, including pictures.  There was a line in the report that I didn’t particularly care for. (“Could indicate a life-threatening condition”).  I called the doctor’s office and they called me back a little while later and said, given the tumor I had removed and the treatment I have had, they are not surprised by what was seen.  Medication I am on will take care of the problem.   They wouldn’t do anything different and would see me for my already scheduled appointment on the 27^th and 30th.  So once again, I had the choice, trust or panic.  I am thankful for the peace of God, when I choose to not worry and trust God.  The eye doctor did remind me of something else that I’m not so sure I appreciate.  He said remember you are 41.

And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. – Philippians 4:7

Yesterday, when I went for my appointment, the appointment itself was covered by insurance, the extra pictures taken were not.  However, the doctor chose to do them at no charge.

Significant improvements in how I’ve been feeling.

God’s continued provision.

Improved strength.

PRAYER REQUESTS:

Follow-up MRI on Nov 27th and then a doctor visit on the 30th.

The electronic stimulation device for my leg mentioned in a previous blog – still waiting for some details to sort out, but we’re getting closer.

Courage to face the unknown and opportunities to show the grace of God through difficult times.

#48 HAPPY VETERANS DAY

Happy Veterans Day!!  On November 11, America recognizes those men and women who have served in the US military.  I am proud and honored to say I have several family members who have served in various branches of the military (Army, Navy, Air Force and Marines).  Of course, I can’t pass up the opportunity to recognize my favorite sailor of all, my dad.  And to all those US veterans who have served, THANK YOU for your service!!

Optune update:

The lady came to check my progress with Optune for the month.  As I had hoped and really tried hard to accomplish, I was, in fact her star pupil, scoring a 107%, compared to 88% last month.  Now her numbers are slightly different but when you do the math and figure things based on a percentage, that’s what you come up with.  She didn’t have any stickers, but we found some anyway (Look at my shirt collar).  Not to mention the reward/satisfaction of doing well.  My brother, David, of course, accused me of being a “teacher’s pet”.  Thanks a lot, David.  The important thing is, a better score means more work the machine is doing to fight the cancer.

 a few thoughts from the week:

Being back in church this past Sunday was such an encouragement.  I am so grateful to live in a country that allows me the freedoms to worship openly and publicly call myself a Christian, unlike so many other places around the world.  I am also grateful to be a part of a church that is not afraid to proclaim the TRUTH. If you’re in Highlands county, specifically Sebring and looking for a good church with great teaching and wonderful, praying people, give Southside Baptist Church a try (379 South Commerce Avenue. – across from the courthouse).

My heart does ache for the families of those murdered in churches here in America recently.

I was just telling someone this week that this journey feels like it is more in the style of the hundred years war, not a short battle we often face from day to day.  Since this journey began over a year ago,  it continues to be a daily battle of mind, body and spirit to get up and keep fighting.  I am so thankful for those who continue to stick it out with me and walk prayerfully and encouragingly day after day.  More importantly,  I’m thankful for the daily strength God provides and the reminder that 

He is always there walking ahead of me.

Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness. - Isaiah 41:10

praises:

Improvements in how I’ve been feeling.

Improved strength.

There are so many things I could start telling you of how God has blessed me, but that would take more than just a simple blog - more like an entire series of books with multiple volumes.  All the way from the provision of this Optune device, to items that assist in my continued therapy I do at home, to provision of the second chemo, all of which have not been covered through insurance, but provided through God’s hands of provision.  And if you have had any experience with cancer treatment, then you have an idea of what these items have for price tags.  Thank you, God, for your hand of provision and mercy.  And thank you for stickers and the opportunity to receive them.  Yes, I believe God cares if we get excited about stickers.  He cares about us.  If only we would be more excited about telling others of His grace as we are about some of the simpler things in life.

“Because I can moment”:

For the first time about a week ago, since before January, I was able to wipe my shoes (both feet) when I came in the door.  I also used the pepper grinder again this week and it went much better than the first time.  A lot more pepper landed in my plate than on the table.

PRAYER REQUESTS:

Follow-up MRI on Nov 27th and then a doctor visit on the 30th.

#47 BE STILL – WRITTEN (THURSDAY)

Medical Update:

I have another MRI on Nov 27th followed by a doctor visit on the 30th. This will help them confirm if what they saw on the last scan is effects of treatment. They are doing two tests. One is a normal MRI. The other is called a perfusion scan. It is essentially an MRI just with a difference in the contrast portion. This will make for a long day. But that’s OK. There are always things to entertain yourself with, if you just look around and don’t stress over it.

I am feeling better than I have in a while. Still tired but the headaches and dizziness are improving as we have worked with adjusting medication. There are still more adjustments coming as they have to be slow, but we’re getting there.

The lady with the company for Optune is scheduled to come next week. I want to set out some stickers for her to give me when I impress her with my grade. As I said, I intend to be her star pupil this time. Maybe I’ll just reward myself with the satisfaction that I did better than before, I hope. 😊

But stickers are nice, if earned.

A few thoughts from the week:

A verse and song have been in my head a lot this week, especially today, that God has used to remind me that He is God and can do anything He chooses.

Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth - Psalm 46:10

"Be Still And Know"

Be still and know that He is God

Be still and know that He is holy

Be still Oh restless heart of mine

Bow before the Prince of Peace

Let the noise and clamor cease

Be still and know that He is God

Be still and know that He is faithful

Consider all that He has done

Stand in awe and be amazed

And know that He will never change

Be still

Be still and know that He is God

Be still and know that He is God

Be still and know that He is God

Be still

Be speechless

Be still and know that He is God

Be still and know that He is our Father

Come and rest your head upon His breast

Listen to the rhythm of

His unfailing heart of love

Beating for his little ones

Calling each of us to come

Be still

Be still

PRAISES:

Encouraging MRI and doctor visit.

Improvements in how I’ve been feeling

“Because I can moment”:

This past week I wanted to talk to some wonderful people at the Therapy Center of Sebring, who continue to help me when I need advice or have questions. I can’t say enough about this place or the people who work there. THEY ARE WONDERFUL!! Well, it’s been a long time since I had gone in there with just a cane. But this week I did that and left the walker in the car.

My two brothers my parents and I will be together this year for Thanksgiving. This will be the first time in a long time given the fact we have all been separated by oceans during the holidays for many years. I am looking forward to spending time together.

I have another praise to share with you that JUST happened.

This morning I had made several phone calls trying to get medicine here. On Monday I was supposed to start my second chemo. Well, this is the one provided by the pharmaceutical company free of charge to me. For some reason there were issues getting it shipped out. This morning I made the decision that since God knew all about it, there was no reason for me to stress or worry over it. The verse and song above kept running through my head. Well, while I was working on this entry I took a break for dinner. While I was away from the computer, I got an email from the shipping company (FedEx). They are shipping it overnight and it will be here tomorrow.

PRAYER REQUESTS:

Medication adjustments, in hopes it will eliminate the headaches and dizziness.

Wisdom for future decisions.

Encouragement and strength for family during this whole process while still helping me with my medical care and therapy.

The electronic stimulation device for my leg mentioned in a previous blog – still waiting for some details to sort out, but we’re getting closer.

Courage to face the unknown and opportunities to show the grace of God through difficult times.

#46 MEDICAL UPDATE FROM OCTOBER 26

Quick medical update:

For the past couple of weeks, I haven’t been feeling as well as before (extremely tired, headaches and just an overall feeling that I had something like the flu).  As I spoke to different doctors and other medical personnel, it has been suspected that it may be a medication issue. 

October 26th, 2017 trip to moffitt for mri and doctor visit:

The doctor came in after I had the scan and said all in all it's a pretty good scan. There are some things that could be new growth, but the doctor and the radiologist both think it is more likely to be marks from the radiation I had. To be sure, they want to keep an eye on it. I'll have another scan in a month. Seems the trouble I've had the last couple of weeks is related to some medication changes. Those changes are good and needed, but he said my body will have to dictate how those changes can happen.

update on optune:

Optune (the device I wear on my head) is going pretty well.  I still have some issues with it, but we’re working those out.  I get a grade when the company representative comes out to check on me and the device.  She downloads information from the machine to see if I’ve been using it correctly and for the required time.  When she came out this last time I didn’t get the grade I was hoping for.  Apparently, I haven’t been turning the machine off and on in the proper sequence (maybe a hurricane had something to do with that).  However, for an honor roll student (in high school) and the dean’s list (some during college), the grade was disappointing.  I intend to be her star student this next time.

a few thoughts from the week:

God is patiently working on me physically, emotionally and spiritually.

Something I keep hearing from doctors, nurses, therapists, etc. is “Be patient”. I am so glad God is much more patient with me than I am with myself or situations around me.

I all too oftenI feel I need to help God out when problems arise.  I mentioned in a previous post that sometimes problems arise and I have a choice panic/worry about it, or trust God to handle it.

So, I sat here this past week, pondering my trip to Moffitt Cancer Center for tests and appointments. Despite the fact that I know in my heart God has everything under control, I still found myself anxious over the day, especially considering how I’ve been feeling recently. Then God sends me a little gift such as an encouraging note or a text from a friend (to take my mind off where it had wondered). God could certainly say as I would, “We’ve been here before, Debbie. Haven’t I walked you through tough places in times past?” “Did I ever walk away and leave you to face the circumstance by yourself?” But instead He just reminds me again that He loves me and that though I may have my fears and doubts, He will remain patient with me and faithful. Again, we go back to my favorite song, which I have mentioned before, Great is thy faithfulness.

This all reminded me of a song I learned as a child, and a verse.

Be patient therefore, brethren, unto the coming of the Lord. Behold, the husbandman waiteth for the precious fruit of the earth, and hath long patience for it, until he receive the early and latter rain.


Be ye also patient; stablish your hearts: for the coming of the Lord draweth nigh. (James 5:7-8)

HE'S STILL WORKING ON ME

He's still working on me
To make me what I need to be
It took him just a week to make the moon and stars 
The sun and the earth and Jupiter and Mars
How loving and patient He must be
'Cause He's still workin' on me

He's still working on me
To make me what I need to be
It took him just a week to make the moon and stars 
The sun and the earth and Jupiter and Mars
How loving and patient He must be
'Cause He's still workin' on me

 There really ought to be a sign upon my heart 
Don't judge him yet, there's an unfinished part
But I'll be better just according to His plan
 Fashioned by the Master's loving hands

He's still working on me
To make me what I need to be
It took him just a week to make the moon and stars 
The sun and the earth and Jupiter and Mars
How loving and patient He must be
'Cause He's still workin' on me

In the mirror of His word
 Reflections that I see
 Makes me wonder why He never gave up on me
But He loves me as I am and helps me when I pray
 Remember He's the potter, I'm the clay

He's still working on me
To make me what I need to be
It took him just a week to make the moon and stars 
The sun and the earth and Jupiter and Mars
How loving and patient He must be
'Cause He's still workin' on me

He's still working on me
To make me what I need to be
It took him just a week to make the moon and stars 
The sun and the earth and Jupiter and Mars
How loving and patient He must be

'Cause He's still workin' on me

Now a while back in these blog entries (#39), I mentioned a goal I was aiming for - putting on my dog’s collar. Feeling ambitious after the pepper incident (read below, under Praises) and another small success the following day of catching with my left hand something that was falling. I tried again to put on her collar, but I guess we’re just not ready for that, YET. However, I did have something brought to my attention, again. PATIENCE. Sophie is a rescue dog. Her first few years of life were filled with abuse and she learned, unfortunately, that some humans can’t be trusted. So, for her to put up with me trying to fasten her collar for as long as I tried was pretty significant. Quite a display of patience.

Are you seeing a pattern for the week? Patience

I have said before that Sophie and I are therapy for each other.

praises:

I had another “because I can” moment this week.  If you have no idea what I’m talking about, refer to my previous post #45.  There are these little moments in which I find myself making small steps forward, then I look back and say to myself, “Boy, that took a long time.”  One was the other night at the table.  For the first time this year, I was able to use the pepper grinder, previously I hadn’t been able to hold it.  Now, I’ll be honest with you.  More pepper ended up on the table than in my plate.

Thank You, Lord, for being so patient with me, not giving up when I fail to learn the lesson or don’t have the faith I should. Another one of those moments came up today.  Dealing with insurance companies can be quite disturbing sometimes.  Again, came the opportunity to worry, get frustrated or trust Him to fix it.  Once again, He fixed it.

PRAYER REQUESTS:

Medication adjustments.

Wisdom for future decisions.

Strength for family during this whole process while still helping me with my medical care and therapy.

The electronic stimulation device mentioned in my last blog – still waiting on insurance. . . 

#45 BECAUSE I CAN

This week I celebrated another birthday (Yes, with frozen yogurt). I am surrounded by a great group of friends and family who sent birthday greetings in so many different forms. There were greetings on Facebook, emails, text messages (SMS) phone calls and visits.  Some of those messages travelled all the way around the world, others across America.

One of the things that God has helped me to improve is the strength of my left leg.  Most people would look at this and think of it as small and insignificant.  However, I am learning to celebrate even the little things no matter how small they may be. Well, for about the last couple of weeks.  I have been able to step up steps with my left leg leading.  Since my surgery in January I have stepped up a step first with my right leg and then pulled the left up to meet it.  However, about a month ago, I noticed that my left leg was stepping up much higher than it had been. So, I took a chance to see if it would be possible to step up with my left leg first. and what do you know? It worked. So, for the first time in 9 months I was able to step up with my left leg first followed by the right.  Now, this is not to say that I'm running up and down steps.  Despite the fact that my nickname is Flash, there are still limits to what I can currently do. I'm thankful, however, there are no limits to what God can do and has done in my life.  So, now when I walk up to the door which has a small step, I will even take an extra step to get myself in position for my left foot to be the one to go first. and I will say to whoever is around me, and understands my new motto. “Because I can”.  Now that thought extends beyond my left side mobility and into more personal

matters like waiting for another MRI next week and day to day struggles in life.  Which reminded me of a verse and song I would like to share with you.  Whenever, you feel you just can’t go any further.  Remember:

I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me. Philippians 4:13

His Strength Is Perfect

I can do all things

Through Christ who gives me strength

But sometimes I wonder what He can do through me

No great success to show

No glory on my own

Yet in my weakness He is there to let me know

His strength is perfect when our strength is gone

He'll carry us when we can't carry on

Raised in His power, the weak become strong

His strength is perfect, His strength is perfect

We can only know

The power that He holds

When we truly see how deep our weakness goes

His strength in us begins

Where ours comes to an end

He hears our humble cry and proves again

His strength is perfect when our strength is gone

He'll carry us when we can't carry on

Raised in His power, the weak become strong

His strength is perfect, His strength is perfect

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QGC9KT918Kk

praises:

• God has again provided more items that help make my daily life and lack of mobility easier.God has continued to help me reduce some more of my medication.  This is still an ongoing process and continues to be a rather rough road.God has helped me make more adjustments to Optune.
• Improvements in my mobility (though small and slow).  It’s a good, though frustrating lesson in patience.
• God’s continued grace, strength and provision.

PRAYER REQUESTS:

• Continued cleanup and restoration efforts around Sebring and Highlands County after the hurricane.
• Upcoming presidential elections in Kenya.
• Adjustments to Optune and medication changes.
• Wisdom for future decisions.
• Strength for family during this process while still helping me with my medical care and therapy.
• The electronic stimulation device mentioned in my last blog – still waiting on insurance.
• Next MRI & doctor visit – Oct 26 and the waiting that leads up to that day.